Chris Port Blog #342. ‘Antihuntish’, or ‘The Little Hunt Who’s Not All There’

Antihuntish, or The Little Hunt Who’s Not All There

(with apologies to Hughes Mearns)

© Chris Port, 18^th October 2012

Yesterday, in splendid wealth

I met the Secretary for Health

Or was it Culture? I don’t know

I wish I could behead the oaf…

He told a grinning peasant joke

That tickled me like poison oak

So Philip asked him “Who are you?”

And left the little prick subdued.

Go away, go away, or I’ll ring my servant bell!

Go away, go away, no don’t touch it, you Hunt... (Hell!)

Last night I saw upon the news

A grubby man with ghastly views

He wasn’t there on VE day

Oh, how I wish he’d go away.

'Who are you?': Queen not amused by Health Secretary Jeremy Hunt’s James Bond joke, and a typically blunt Prince Philip doesn’t even know who he is

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Antigonish, or The Little Man Who Wasn’t There

Hughes Mearns, 1899

Yesterday, upon the stair,
I met a man who wasn’t there
He wasn’t there again today
I wish, I wish he’d go away...

When I came home last night at three
The man was waiting there for me
But when I looked around the hall
I couldn’t see him there at all!
Go away, go away, don’t you come back any more!
Go away, go away, and please don’t slam the door... (slam!)

Last night I saw upon the stair
A little man who wasn’t there
He wasn’t there again today
Oh, how I wish he’d go away